The patterns we act out in developing emotional and physical intimacy are developed from the earliest stories of our lives, from the ones we learned how to love. Sometimes these patterns helps us, sometimes they hinder. As we dig into these narratives we see how we are repeating these stories to ourselves and finding ourselves in the same scenes but with different actors over and over again. You can take responsibility of this narration and develop new, more healthy and helpful way of cultivating intimacy with others. What we encounter in a partner can sometimes help us discover what we have lost in ourselves. Going there together can help us grow.
Do you feel misunderstood or ignored by your partner? Are your unable to reach him or her? Are you tired of constantly being blamed? Fed up with lengthy debates that end up in icy silence or a tug of war? Your relationship or marriage, which not so long ago was happy and loving, seems to be on the rocks. Is it just a rough patch or a collapse?
Relationships develop in stages. Each stage requires attention and work from both partners for their connection to mature. It is awfully difficult to disentangle relationship issues on your own. Counselling can help you as a couple to deal with the challenges of intimacy and distance, rejection and acceptance, power and vulnerability. You can rediscover what connects and separates you. You can find support along the way by an unbiased yet involved professional.
Sometimes it feels like a dilemma. Should you work for a future together or apart? Is this what I need? Sometimes you feel caught even in two struggles: the struggle with your partner and the silent struggle inside. These are big questions. If you are still together, there is still a connection and hope. You don’t have to undergo these struggles alone. You can get professional help and guidance.
A crisis in a relationship offers an opportunity for growth, recovery and authentic reconnection. It can have a lot of manifestations, such as continuous misunderstanding, escalation of stress strategies, addiction, adultery or unfaithfulness, violence, abuse, and manipulation, among many others.
Many people spend a lot of time looking for the “right” person to bond with, or grapple with constantly encountering the wrong type of person, “what’s going on?” What lies behind this pattern of not finding the connection you desire?
This work can be done individually, even before you have met someone, or with a partner to build better intimacy patterns and heal past wounds.
I will help you look into, understand and eventually improve your patterns of communication. I will help you work past your ‘projections’ and (re)discover your needs. You will be able to reconnect on a different level or decide on a respectful separation. Contact me below to start the journey: